| Toy Trunk Railroad by Erik Sansom
Buy my Books - Click Here! THE KADI CENTER! Q: If the Japanese built the leaning tower of Pisa in South India, what
would they name it ?
Ans: Nikimo nikado ( Nikkumo Nikkadho in tamil means - "will it stand or will it not")
YOURS FUNNILY,... ENGINEERS AND LAWYERS
Three lawyers and three engineers are traveling by
train to a conference. At the station, the three lawyers each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket. "How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asked one of the three lawyers. "Watch
and you'll see," answers one of the engineers. They all board the train. The lawyers take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Ticket, please." The door
opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on. The lawyers saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the lawyers decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all. "How are you going to travel without a ticket," asks
one perplexed lawyer. "Watch and you'll see," says one of the engineers. When they board the train the three lawyers cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to
the restroom where the lawyers are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please."
OVERWORKED!!?! ...
For a couple years I've been blaming it on lack of sleep
and too much pressure from my job, but now I found out
the real reason: I'm tired because I'm overworked.
The population of the U.S. is 237 million.
104 million are retired.
That leaves 133 million to do the work.
There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million
to do the work.
Of this there are 29 million employed by the federal
government, leaving 19 million to do the work.
2.8 million are in the Armed Forces, which leaves 16.2
Million to do the work.
Take from the total the 14,800,000 people who work for
State and City Governments and that leaves 1.4 million
to do the work.
At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals,
leaving 1,212,000 to do the work.
Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons.
That leaves just two people to do the work.
You and me.
And you're sitting at your computer reading jokes!!
ANSWERS FOR THE CROSSWORD ACROSS
1. A refractive error due to distortion of the curvature of the cornea.It results in blurring in one axis and affects vision of distant and near objects equally (11) ASTIGMATISM
6. Prescription abbrev, twice a day (2) BD
7. Erb's palsy of the infant may result from birth injury to this nerve complex (8, 6) BRACHIAL PLEXUS
9. A species of vegetable micro-organisms, the cause of thrush (5) YEAST
10. Combining term, Greek, physician (4) IATR
12. Extension beyond the usual limits (10) PROGRESSION
13. Azidothymidine, abbrev (3) AZT
15. Rubefacients relieve this (4) ACHE
16. Opacity of the crystalline lens of the eye or its capsule (8) CATARACT
17. Prescription abbrev, compound (2) CO
19. A symptom complex comprising nausea, abdominal discomfort, headache and constipation, formerly attributed to excessive bile secretion (11) BILIOUSNESS
22. Prescription abbrev, before dinner (2) AP
23. Chemical symbol, americium (2) AM
25. The simplest form into which matter can be divided (7) ELEMENT
26. A chronic disease of the lungs in which there is abnormal distension of alveoli due to chronic bronchial obstruction and subsequent loss of lung elasticity (9) EMPHYSEMA
DOWN
1. Visual impairment of one eye (or rarely both) from lack of use (9) AMBLYOPIA
2. Non-narcotic analgesic for moderate and severe pain (8, 3) TRAMADOL HCL
3. 2 Down provides this (9) ANALGESIA
4. Not open, abnormally closed (11) IMPERFORATE
5. The fatty substance surrounding the axon of medullated nerve fibers (6) MYELIN
6. An abnormal sound or murmur heard on ascultation of the heart and large vessels (5) BRUIT
8. Prefix meaning other or different (6) HETERO
11. Retinal changes sometimes seen early in the course of subacute bacterial endocarditis (4, 5) ROTH (SPOTS)
14. An aromic vegetable juice such as one used for steam inhalations (6) BALSAM
16. Antitussives suppress these (6) COUGHS
17. Carbon monoxide (2) CO
18. See 11 Down (5) SPOTS
19. These salts are the constituents responsible for irritation of the skin in jaundice (4) BILE
20. The irritation described in 19 Down (4) ITCH
21. The deep, dreamless period of sleep during which the brain waves are slow and of high voltage, abbrev (4) NREM
24. Word element, middle (3) MES
26. Anesthesia produced in a limited area, abbrev (2) LA |
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